How To Recognise The Signs of Sexual Abuse

Whether you’re just starting your sexual journey and want to keep safe or trying to find out if your partner is abusive, this post is for you and how to recognise the signs of sexual abuse.

The Definition of Sexual Abuse

In short, sexual abuse refers to sexual physical or verbal harm inflicted upon a person. It can be understood as both sexual harassment and sexual assault. Sexual harassment can include many kinds of improper behaviours of sexual nature. For example, a stranger touching your bum without permission is harassment. A stranger shouting obscenities at you in the street is harassment. A colleague making sexual propositions even though you’d previously said no is harassment. It can also include making sexual comments meant to humiliate your sexual orientation.

The types of sexual assault are:

• rape or attempted rape (also including condom removal during sex)
• sodomy (forcing someone to perform oral or anal sex)
• incest – asexual abuse faced from a family member

Other types of abuse might include not informing a partner about STDs, unwanted kisses, touching and sexual contact with someone too drunk to consent.

How To Recognise Sexual Abuse?

Recognising sexual abuse isn’t always straightforward. As children, we are often taught to be obedient instead of learning how to be assertive. For example, you might have been one of those kids forced to hug family members even though your parents knew you weren’t comfortable with it. This might lead to having little sense of body autonomy and make it difficult to recognise when someone is disrespecting our boundaries in adulthood. If someone pressures you to do something sexual you don’t want to do, you can consider it sexual abuse, even if other people might think it’s ‘nothing’. If you feel violated, it’s only your opinion that matters.

What to Do If My Partner is Sexually Abusive?

Facing abuse from someone you love and trust might be difficult to accept. It’s not uncommon not to notice signs of abuse as they often develop gradually. As soon as you realise your partner is being abusive, reach out to someone you trust. They can support you and find you a place to stay away from the abuser. Whether you want to contact the authorities is your choice but consider reaching out for professional help.

Contact My Family Psychologist for a confidential chat and see how we can help.